Monday, 8 June 2009

Early June news from the Wigan Robins: Martinez to join at Christmas

Well due to John Neafcy refusing to speak to SKY Sports and the BBC after he was acused of "tapping up" a Downall Green United player who's agent just happened to be a "Neafcy" means that news is a little thin on the ground.

However the following can be reported - not all of it may be true...

Ryan Small (Wigan's best midfielder) was spotted at the counter in Billinge Spar buying a Twix and a can of Coke

The same Ryan Small has told Skem United to "eff off" stating; "I'm Robins 'til I die." Plus (probably): "I'll never pay my fines off!"

FC United are thought to be sniffing - they'll get the same answer (hopefully). Plus he'd never manage to get the train to midweek training sessions

Ben Kay is on holiday thinking over a move to Atletico Madrid

Dougy Pitts is sat in Ashton thinking over a move to St Helens Town

The kit will again be Red & White Hoops - but with a new sponsor. The Rossoneri kit will have to wait another year...

There are some really good frendlies set up - but just waiting for confirmation.

Roberto Martinez has agreed a three-year deal to turn out for the stiffs when required. He could be free after Christmas. Hope not like... as he'll never get Mossy's place.

Taffy Roberts was heavily backed at 16-1 with Doris the Bookmaker over on Mudhuts for the Latics job. It is thought Father Jack wouldn't shell out for a new crutch for Taffy.

Jimmy "Chipper" Martin and Titus Bramble will be gettng the bus to matches together after their recent driving misdemeanours.

The Bath Springs has become a Gastro Pub. Rumours that Ian told Gordon Ramsey to "Feck off" when he tried to add Fried Mars Bars to the menu are unconfirmed.

The Bear has promised to lose three stones in weight this summer!

Paul Vermiglio has promised to lose four stones in weight this summer!!

Vaughanie has promised to lose five stones in weight this summer!!!

He's also promised to update this blog every couple of days so....

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